Tips for a stronger marriage

Communication is key

Posted: Sunday, June 01, 2008

Divorce coach Jennifer Coleman, MS/ Ed.S. NCC says since June is the most popular month for marriages, it’s also the most popular month for anniversaries. From her work at Rosen helping couples through their divorce, Coleman shares her insights on how to keep a marriage strong whether you’re celebrating your 5th anniversary or your 50th anniversary.

“In any relationship you're going to have ups and downs with periods of boredom and passion and periods when you feel very close or a bit distant,” says Coleman, who is married with two young children and has a background in marriage and family counseling. “These patterns are natural, but being aware of them and knowing when it's a good time to check in with your spouse is critical in any marriage, new or old.”

Coleman recently launched a podcast on StayHappilyMarried.com, a website that’s dedicated to providing couples who want to stay together with the resources they need to build a happy marriage. In her podcast she touches on issues that commonly cause problems in a relationship such as lack of communication. She advises couples to set common aspirations in the interest of the marriage instead of making personal goals. She also suggests couples draw out what steps can be taken to repair a relationship if one party is contemplating divorce.

“What being a divorce coach has taught me is you really need to be proactive in your marriage,” says Coleman. “That means meeting with a marriage counselor once every six months or going on a weekend getaway together, but regardless, you need to take the initiative to keep the marriage healthy.”

Coleman admits the lessons she’s learned from the mistakes of her clients have even helped her avoid problems in her own marriage and says she is a lot more aware of how things are in her own relationship.

“As you continue to grow in your marriage, you start taking for granted that your spouse will always be there no matter what,” says Coleman. “While this is a really nice place to be, you need to preserve and manage the relationship, because it takes work no matter how long you’ve been together.”

To listen to Jennifer Coleman's complete podcast, What I Learned About Marriage from Being a Divorce Coach, visit www.stayhappilymarried.com.

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